The way I am......was

I always thought I had a good definition of what a good mother and wife was. I have always known what moms do and how wives should behave and it never crossed my mind once that there was a different opinion out there......until about 8 years ago.

8 years ago I moved to California. I was very much looking forward to the sun and beaches you see on tv. What you don't see on tv is that all of California doesn't look like 90210. Where I lived we had rolling hills and cows. Clearly this was a shock. The surprises didn't stop there. I began to meet other moms and wives and discovered that I had it completely wrong. West coast ladies and East coast ladies have precious little in common. Of course we love our husbands and kids, but the way we go about it is drastically different.

I remember the first time someone asked me if I would be making baby food for my in utero baby. "Who makes baby food? Don't you just buy it at the store?" I balked. Little did I know that every product in the store would soon give me cancer and if I loved my family like I proclaimed then I would immediately buy a food mill and start churning my own butter. I needed to breast feed my baby because she would certainly end up retarded and on welfare if I gave her formula. It was a very scary and unsure time fore me. I was inundated with all these new opinions and information. I was lost.

I also learned that appearance was not truly important. I had to look gorgeous without looking like I tried. How does one use 30+ beauty products and look natural? Where I am from you are shaming your family if you go to Winn Dixie without your makeup on. Here you can just roll out of bed, throw you hair in a ponytail and run the 10 miles to the store. You can show up all sweaty and red faced and no one bats an eye.

Oh yes, I almost forgot. The running
I was so mesmerized by how many people I saw out running, walking, biking and exerting themselves outdoors. The farthest I would walk was to the mail box or maybe around the mall. And forget about running. Unless someone is chasing me with a weapon it ain't gonna happen. I got my fill of running from my Air Force days. I couldn't believe it was trendy to exercise, eat organic and be fit. I have been looking for almost a decade and have yet to find a fish camp.

You are a good mom in the south if you teach your kids manners and respect. You are a good mom here if you teach your kids to recycle and turn off water and light switches. Here you respect the earth and bring your own shopping bags to the store. Its been a really strange ride, but I have found myself somewhere comfortably in the middle. I eat some organic and yes we recycle. I even have a ton of those grocery bags that I take to the store when I can remember. I still wear lots of makeup though, even to the store. Some things are ingrained.

I like how the west coast opened me up to a whole world of information I may have never encountered. Some of it is bad, like how many things are acceptable right out in public. Right up in your face ALL THE TIME. Then there are some great things like learning to be healthy and exercise. I think I can teach my kids to respect me and the planet. It has made me a better mom and wife. Information tends to do that. I still am not running anywhere anytime soon, but I will walk to the gym and eat some veggies. Not today though. We are having pizza.