I am the Queen

As far back as I can remember it has never been ok to comment on a lady's weight, especially your lady. Maybe its just my family, but I never heard a husband comment on his wife's physical appearance, especially in public. I have always been taught to believe that good God fearing husbands pretend to have no opinion on the size or appetite of their wives, if they value their lives. Really, what southern woman would put up with such disrespectful behavior? Us southern gals do a lot. We take pride in our homes and children and yes our own appearance. We educate our younguns on manners and the good Lord. We drive them from here to kingdom come, do the laundry, do the cleaning, do the cooking, and have been known to pull a weed or two.

This being said there are a few things I never expected to do as a married woman. First, I will never push a lawn mower. Never. Not going to happen. I don't care if my lawn resembles the far reaches of the Amazon rain forest. Shame on my husband. Secondly, I will never pump gas. Just don't want to, don't ask. I don't care if you think I am prissy. Think that while you watch my husband pump the gas. I will be in the car. The last thing is hear my husband call me fat. The nerve.

Now Dan has never called me fat. I mean he is still walking right? There was one time he made an ambiguous comment, but that was quickly dealt with. I am shocked to see though, that its a common occurrence here. Husbands calling their wives fat or teasing them about big butts or thighs. I never! I remember the first time I heard a rather attractive girl say her husband teased her about having a big butt. My natural inclination would be to take my large butt elsewhere to someone who could appreciate the whole package. What is up with these guys? And what kind of woman would tolerate such talk. Not this one. I have had 3 children and am not the picture of thinness that I would want to be. Men making comments like that lead women to downing a whole box of little Debbie's. Its a vicious cycle. I guess some men just have no upbringing. I know some of these women. They are not southern and they need to know they do NOT have to put up with it. You don't have to smile and pretend its funny. Its not. Make a comment about his gut or lack of hair on his head and see how many laughs you get.

So if you are a man reading this and you never heard this from your mother or your parents didn't model it for you, be a gentleman. I seriously hope that in my absence from my southern home that boys and girls have not forgotten how to treat one another. I am the queen of my home, a title I have earned thankyouverymuch. My son is going to be a rarity around these parts. We will have to beat the girls off with a stick once he is grown because he will be a southern gentleman. So if your man is a gentleman hooray for him, if he's not.....they can be taught!