Campeen

I avoided it as long as I could. I have stated many a time that I DO NOT DO NATURE. There are bugs there and bears. We mustn't forget the bears. Apparently there are coyotes too. More on that later. My husband, being the outdoorsy person that he is, has always wanted to do the whole family camping bit. He has never pushed it mainly because he sucks at follow through when it comes to planning things, but I knew he really wanted the kids to have those memories so..... I planned a trip.

The first trip I planned was at the coast. It sounded like a scenic place to do a homeless role play, but alas it rained and we had to leave early. This didn't bother me in the least because I didn't sleep a wink that night. I am a terribly light sleeper (blame it on the 4 kids) and I woke up in a panic every time the wind blew the tent around. I was sure it was a vacationing bear there to eat me. It was really cold too. Apparently everyone knew the pitfalls of coastal camping except me so I decided to give it another try as I had not had the proper rustic adventure. 

So I planned another trip to a lakeside campground not far from home with no rain in sight. I packed enough gear and supplies for a small country because basically that's what we are. I checked the forecast again and what do you know? Sunny skies. Extremely sunny skies. I planned a trip for the hottest days we had all summer. I immediately went in search of battery operated fans. I was not cancelling. I was gonna do this nature thing and get it out of the way. I can deal with heat afterall. I am a southern girl. 

And deal I did. I was so stanking hot. Luckily there was a lake for the family to cool off in. I only went in baptismal style without dunking my head. I had done a preemptive blow out to my hair since I wouldn't be washing it and this hair had to last a few days so no water was touching the do. I have a lake thing. I don't do lakes. So I hung out with baby and made sure she was under a constant stream of cool air from my handy dandy fans. Thank the Lord I brought those fans. Each kid had their own and they carried them around like they were attached. I didn't go too far from mine either.

One thing I didn't consider was going to the bathroom at night. I know most people are not bothered by night time potty trips but sometimes you drink a ton of water because you went camping in the Sahara desert and have to pee at 3am.

I woke up and I HAD to go. So of course I woke Dan and asked him what to do. He told me I should walk to the bathroom. In pitch black?! With bears and criminals roaming?! You'd think I was camping in Compton. So I grabbed my flash light and set out for the bathroom. Everything was going fine until I heard a noise. I turned off the faucet to listen closer. It was definitely some animal and it sounded close. I went outside and waited. It sounded like dogs......or wolves..... I speed walked back to camp like a granny with a fanny pack. The noise was getting louder and louder and I was sure I was toast. I finally made it back and just as I was about to enter the tent I was scared out of my skin by Dan standing like a zombie in front of the tent. He said he saw my flash light moving at light speed coming back so he figured he better make sure I was ok. I asked him about the noise and he assured me it wasn't wolves. He just kept saying it wasn't wolves. He wouldn't tell me what it was.

COYOTES!

 Thank goodness for wifi. I immediately googled coyotes of the Northwest and was relieved to find that they don't eat people. That was a close one.

 So I have fulfilled my obligation to the husband and the outdoors. I have had the "experience" and I am done. Maybe by next year I will have forgotten all this and book another trip. My babies sure loved campeen. That may be enough to drag me out there one more time.